Bob Evans

Do you ever just randomly wonder… does Bob Evans even have good ranch? Because same. I usually go there for breakfast: pancakes, eggs, biscuits…I’ve even checked out a soup or two (that were pretty delicious), but one day I switched it up and went rogue with the chicken fingers. That’s when I found out the hard truth: they do, in fact, NOT have good ranch

This is exactly the kind of experience that birthed The Dressing Room. Because someone needed to stand up and give the people the answers they needed. The bubbles always give me a sliver of hope, but I feel like they took a bottle and added milk to water it down. The consistency? Almost water. It slid off the chicken like it had somewhere better to be. The taste? Bland upfront, with a weirdly sour finish that had me squinting. Like, do I still have taste buds? Is it me? (It wasn’t.)

I ended up abandoning ship entirely and letting the honey mustard take over. And honestly? She understood the assignment. The chicken fingers themselves were fine, but they deserved a better co-star. Ranch was not it.