The Bird Bar & Grill

To be fair, our server was upfront and told me it was Hidden Valley when I asked about the ranch. So no shocker here, it came, I smelled, I tasted, I frowned. The Bird is a local dive bar, beloved by college students for its cheap drinks and rowdy vibe, not its fine cuisine. Which is great, it knows what it is, and I love that for them. The real heartbreak? Their onion petals were actually pretty tasty, which just made it extra sad that the ranch wasn’t pulling its weight.